Discover Your Top 5 Values

Living in alignment with our core values allows us to experience our life as worth living.  ALL lives are worth living, but when our personal experiences are aligned with our values, our perception of fulfillment increases.

Yet, so many of us feel under-fulfilled in areas of life we highly value:

• a single mom loses focus of her health and self care to manage the needs of her children and home.

• a businessman feels his family is most important, yet spends most of his time on work.

We can believe in our values (ie: family, health, relationships, spirituality, finances…), but living in alignment with them requires clarity and consistent deliberate action.

This is why this simple 3-step exercise of assessing your values (and your alignment with them) is so EMPOWERING!

Getting clear on and honoring our values allows us to design a lifestyle that suits our soul.

So lets GO! >>>

Step 1: Clarify Your Life Values

Take a few moments to create a list of values that you feel characterize a life worth living.  These are elements of the human experience and foster joy, pride, love and fulfillment for YOU personally.

Examples of Values: 

• work

• relationships

• family

• community

• personal success

• beauty

• finances

• knowledge

• fun

• adventure

• traditions

• independence

• longevity

• spirituality

• truth

• leadership

• fitness

• health

• universal appreciation

• greater purpose

• personal growth

• creativity

• (additional values list by James Clear: Core Values List)

After you’ve spent time writing down all the values that come to mind, go through your list, and select your Top 5.  Take time to identify which values you feel are paramount to you.

Example Top 5:

• Family

• Health

• Personal Growth

• Finances

• Fun

Values can change for us as we grow and shift into different roles.

• As an adult you may value finances differently than you had as a teenager.

Additionally, every person’s values are unique to them, and there is no right or wrong.

• One person may feel leadership is not at all important, while another ranks this value very highly for themself.

This is also an opportunity to honestly reflect on those “Top 5” you’ve selected, and notice if these truly come from you, or are old lessons you’ve carried from early influences in life.

Many times, we feel very strongly about our values, yet disappointed at our lack of fulfillment or success with them.

• We may highly value financial stability, but feel terrible about debt we’re avoiding.

• We value health yet have felt defeated when it comes to consistent exercise.

Let this only be a sign that your values are important to you, but they arn’t being prioritized. Likely, you haven’t got the proper system and environment setup to foster your values consistently. You’re intentions are squashed by interference (we’ll get to that!)

Step 2: Prioritize Your Values Regularly

Honor and tend to your top values like your life depends on it.  Recognizing what our top values are and planning aligned activities into our calendars is what makes life worth living!  When we schedule time for activities that uphold our highest values, and follow through with self-discipline, we’ve created an insurance policy for a more fulfilled life. 

• If one of your top values is Family, you may make Friday evenings routine family time (unplugged, quality time together with a game, movie, hike etc.)

• If one of your top values is Finances, you may create a weekly/monthly budget and review regularly.

• If one of your top values is Spirituality, you may commit to getting outdoors weekly hiking, or join a yoga community.

Develop clear steps and activities you want to maintain in your life that support your top 5 values, and schedule them into your calendar. Make commitments and follow through on them, just like you would follow through with an upcoming doctor’s appointment, or your current project at work. Prioritizing your values into your life’s agenda will create fulfilling experiences that you’re heart and soul desire- and failing to plan is planning to fail.

Be proactive, schedule, prioritize and follow through!

Step 3: Mindfully Assess Obstacles

Notice which distractions keep you from honoring your values.  Be mindful as interruptions arise, and ask yourself “Is this interruption important and urgent?  Or can I tend to it at another time?” Most likely we can revisit it at a better time and continue to honor our current focus.

• During your morning workout, you hear a text message notification.  Rather than opening your phone to read it, you continue with your exercise until you are finished with your session.

• During a Friday evening you’ve planned to spend with your children, you hear about a networking opportunity at a local brewery.  You decide to maintain your family plans rather than cancel for the event.

Many times, our human urge to be comfortable and protected can be a barrier to aligning with our deepest values. It is important to notice that living in alignment with our values does not always feel comfortable- and infact requires energy, effort, and healthy self-discipline to withstand.

• You value physical health, yet find it very challenging to consistently eat nourishing foods and regularly exercise.

• You value leadership success, yet find it challenging to attend networking events and speak publicly.

• You value fun, yet find it challenging to engage in activities that arn’t financially gaining.

Gaining clarity on these challenges and barriers first should allow you to feel human but also give you perspective on what your comfort zone is, and how it may be keeping you stuck. Remember, all growth happens OUTSIDE our comfort zones. Expect to feel discomfort and accept that as part of the experience of proactively living.

Focus on the purpose of your aligned actions (ie: living a healthy vibrant life, raising a healthy wholesome family, generating financial stability and security). Although it may not feel comfortable in the moment taking action (and perhaps you wont even “feel like doing it”) revisit the bigger picture. Taking consistent action aligned with your values creates a powerful compound effect and create those deep fulfilling experiences in life.

As a review of this 3-step exercise:

• What are your Top 5 values?

• How aligned do you feel you’re currently living with each of these values?

• Are there any changes you’d like to make to increase fulfillment and life satisfaction? What?

• How will you schedule into your life’s agenda and follow through to live more aligned with your top values?

Getting clear on and honoring our values allows us to design a lifestyle that suits our soul- empower yourself and enjoy!

I am a certified Life and Health Coach, with an M.S. in Mental Health Counseling. I work with smart individuals who currently are feeling stuck in their habits, health, careers or relationships.  I help them find clarity and realignment- transforming from stressed and stuck to engaged and thriving! 

Click here and book a complimentary Clarity Call to explore more for yourself, and see if working with a Coach is a good fit for you and your life!