Find Your Tribe
Jim Rohn said it best: “We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with.”
Look around - you’ll find plenty of examples of how we soak up the qualities of those around us.
From the conversation topics in a group thread, to the type of drink you order at the bar.
Our relationships with others will determine much of our behavior, habits and mindset.
How A Tribe Can Help You Succeed
One of the most powerful ways to improve your habits is to join a culture where your desired behavior is the norm. New habits seem doable when you see others doing them daily. If you surround yourself with physically fit people, you’re more likely to consider maintaining high activity to be a normal habit. If you’re surrounded by musicians, you’re more likely to believe it’s reasonable to practice your instrument daily.
Surround yourself with others who have the habits you desire for yourself.
Find your people.
You’ll rise together.
Nothing sustains motivation better than belonging to a tribe.
It transforms a personal quest into a shared one. Before, you were on your own. A lone wolf. When you join a group your identity becomes linked to those around you. You are part of a pack. We are heathy eaters. We invest in our personal development. We exercise. We work on our intimate relationships. This is why remaining part of a group after achieving a goal is crucial to maintaining your habits. It is friendship and community that embed a new identity and help behaviors last over the long run.
Let Go of Relationships That Diminish Your Values
Without relationships that support your goals (and foster good habits) you deal with a series of issues. You may feel alienated, or insecure. You’ll likely feel discouraged, with very limited progress on your goals. It’s also likely you’ve developed a skewed expectation of what supportive relationships feel like.
This is an opportunity to reflect on your current connections. If a relationship or group feels draining and negative, you don’t have to stick with it simply because you’ve been friends for years.
In the end- our lives are ours to navigate. We get to choose the energy and frequency.
Let go of those who poke fun at the things you dream about, or undermine an identity you long to embrace. And know that it’s ok to step back from those who continue to muddle in self-sabotage and recruit you for the deep-diving company. Remaining aligned with these individuals will only keep you stuck.
Its also an opportunity to sort out those who genuinely love you, but don’t necessarily support your goals or the action steps you’re trying to take to get there. That’s okay! Aunt Gretchen will continue to guilt trip you as you decline that 2nd piece of pecan pie; loves you but isn’t going to support you in your health goals. In relationships, it’s your responsibility to recognize the dynamics and maintain your boundaries. Remember, this is your life, and honoring your boundaries will help you create the life you desire and a healthy existence for all your relationships.
Join a CommUNITY
If you’re already a part of a supportive, proactive community then I’m sure this article resonated with you! Being part of a pack helps you go farther and grow greater!
Cultivate community in your life that helps you feel supported and empowered to take action aligned with your values. Being a part of a book club, fit fam, educational class, ministry group, etc. all provide that foundational base to help you uphold your goals and go far beyond where you’d go alone. And actively schedule time to spend with those you know have a positive impact on you and help your light shine bright. These relationships not only promote your personal growth and development, but they feel so damn GOOD to be in!
If you’ve got goals in mind (improve your habits, health, career, finances, relationships, etc.), accountability and a support are the KEYS to helping you continue to take action and create success! I’m inviting you to click here to learn about our upcoming “Goal Getters” Success Group – a positive, encouraging, supportive community for like-minded people looking to maintain their personal power with positive shifts and consistent accountability!
We’ll be developing our own personal goals and slaying them as we hold ourselves to a high standard, provide accountability, support, and expand in every area of life!
Marissa Davitt is a certified Life and Health Coach, with an M.S. in Mental Health Counseling. She works with smart individuals who currently are feeling stuck in their habits, health, careers or relationships. She helps them find clarity and realignment and transform from stressed and stuck to successful and thriving!
Click here and book a complimentary Clarity Call to explore more for yourself, and see if working with a Coach is a good fit for you and your life!